Hate Her or Love Her
by writinginmyjeans
Summary: The three times James Potter told a Marauder he hated Lily Evans and the one time they tell him that he loved her. JamesxLily Oneshot


**Title: **I hate her, don't I? **  
Genre: **Family/ Friendship/ Hurt/Comfort/ Romance **  
Pairings: **James/Lily, Marauders Friendship**  
Words: **2,804 words**  
Summary: **The three times James Potter told a Marauder he hated Lily Evans and the one time they tell him that he loves her.

**1.**

"Gryffindor!"

James grinned as the students at the Gryffindor cheered for him, hopping off the stool as he made his way towards his new House table. Sirius was still cheering when he reached the table while Remus gave him a thumbs up and Peter shot him a shy smile. James smiled at them, silently breathing a smile of relief and happiness as he looked around the table as McGonagal called upon the nest student. His happiness dimmed when he realised the red head he had met earlier was frowning at him.

He stuck out his tongue at her and she rolled her eyes, moving her attention back to the other group of First Years who had yet to be sorted.

Honestly, what was her problem? She seemed as moody as her greasy-haired friend on the train. Speaking of which, James suddenly remembered that _Snivellus _had not been sorted yet.

"Snape, Severus."

"The Sorting Hat will probably slip off his head, from the looks of how oily his hair is," Sirius whispered to him and together, they sniggered. The redhead – Lily was her name, if he remembered correctly – glared at them, having heard Sirius' comment and turned away from them. From the look on her face, and the pleading one she shot Snivellus, James gathered that she was hoping that Snivellus was sorted into Gryffindor.

James prayed for the opposite. No way was he sharing a dorm with someone who wanted to be a Slytherin and was friends with the most insufferable girl he had ever met.

"Slytherin!"

As applause broke out from the Slytherin table, James watched as a cloud of sadness loomed over Evans' face as she shot her friend a shaky, apologetic smile while Snape just shook his head in disappointment and walked towards the Slytherin table with hunched shoulders. He rolled his eyes at the scene he had witnessed.

As the last student was Sorted into Hufflepuff and Dumbledore announced the start of his first dinner as a Gryffindor, James turned to the redhead girl across from him.

"You're better off without him anyway, Evans," he found himself saying and when she glared at him, he continued in a bored tone. "He wanted to be in that slimy house in the first place. Just be thankful the Sorting Hat sorted you here."

James grinned when Sirius announced his presence in their conversation by agreeing with him. From the corner of his eye, he saw Remus shift uncomfortably while Peter just nodded.

"Be thankful for being sorted with insufferable prats like you, Potter?" Evans scoffed and James' eyes narrowed at her. "No thanks, Potter."

"You'd do well to watch that tongue of yours, Evans," he drawled. "I was just giving you some free advice."

"Well, I don't want or need anything from you, Potter. Not now, not ever." And with that, she turned away from him and started talking to Marlene McKinnon.

"Mental, that one," Sirius grunted and James could not help but agree. He accepted the piece of drumstick his new friend offered him. "Best for you to stay away from her, James."

"She was actually really nice to me on the train," Peter quietly told him. Sirius rolled his eyes at Peter's statement and uninterested, he started a conversation with Remus. James just raised his eyebrows at Peter as his timid new friend continued, "You must have rubbed her the wrong way, James. After all, you did insult her best friend."

"Well, I don't like her very much," James announced and Peter looked at him, eyes wide at his revelation. If Evans was going to insist on being friends with a slime ball like Snivellus, then James wanted nothing to do with her. Right then, as Evans shot him a dirty look when he asked her to pass the chicken and promptly ignored him, James decided he hated Lily Evans.

**2.**

"Potter!"

James grinned as Lily walked stealthily towards him, no doubt to accept his invitation as his date to Hogsmeade that weekend. He frowned when instead of thanking him, she hurled the Howler he had sent her onto the breakfast table and glared at him.

"If this is an idea of a prank, Potter, then you have gone too far!" she seethed and James sighed. Of course she thought it was a prank. After all, he had spent the past two and a half years making life for her and Snivellus relatively hard in school.

"It really isn't, Evans. It has come to my attention that you have matured into a beautiful young woman, Lilypad," he smirked when he saw Snivellus pale at his words. "So what do you say, love? Ditch Snivellus and go out with me for once?"

He frowned when Peter choked at his words and knew that he had said something wrong the moment Remus groaned and hid his face in his hands. Sirius just nodded along. In front of him, Evans gaped before angrily taking a step backwards.

"Stop calling him that, Potter!" she fumed and James realized that Snape had straightened at her words, a slow smirk forming across his ugly face. "I would rather sit through a whole week's worth of lessons with Binns than go out with you. You're pompous, arrogant and if you ever ask me out again, I will use a spell on you that will not only humiliate your sorry arse, but also make sure that no other girl in this school has to endure you. Let's go, Severus."

With that, she stomped out of the Great Hall, a smirking Snape following after her. James felt his face heat up at the laughter he could hear at his expense and could only scowl when Sirius tugged him to sit back down.

"Ouch, Prongs," Sirius grinned and James glared at his friend to stop any irritating comments that Sirius would have offered. Sirius shrugged and continued eating his breakfast.

"I hate her," James muttered and Remus raised his eyebrow at his friend. "I'm serious, Moony. She's crazy if she thinks that I would be interested in her after that stunt she just pulled."

"Right. She chose her best friend over the boy who has been tormenting them since they stepped onto the Hogwarts Express," Remus rolled his eyes when James threw him an annoyed look. "What a witch."

"I'm serious, Moony," James repeated and childishly stomped his feet when Remus gave him a look of disbelief. "I hate her. I hate Lily Evans and I want nothing to do with her."

He asked her out three hours later when she returned from Hogsmeade.

**3. **

He swallowed the lump of guilt as he approached her, ready for her to scream at him for being an idiot. His heart broke at the sight of Lily's trembling shoulders, knowing that he was the cause for her tears and her sorrow. If he had just kept his mouth shut, if he had just resisted the urge to pick on Severus and ignored Sirius' prompt, Lily would not be crying. She would not be shedding her tears because her best friend had called her a Mudblood, and she would not have lost the best friend she had stuck through since they began their journey as Hogwarts students.

She must have heard him approach because she turned back to look at him. James braced himself, ready for her to throw herself at him and yell at him for being an arrogant prick. Instead, he knew that things had really changed when Lily just turned back to staring at the fireplace.

"What do you want, Potter?" she asked, her voice rasp from crying for so long and soft because of how tiring the day must have been for her. James sighed as he took a place beside her and handed her a piece of tissue.

"I'm sorry, Evans," he said softly, and nodded when she gave him a look of surprise. "I shouldn't have antagonised Sniv – Snape."

"You're right, you shouldn't have," she glared at him through her tears then, and the anger she displayed was so sudden that James wished he had just kept quiet. "If you had just resisted the urge to be an arrogant prick for once, none of what happened today would have occurred."

He felt himself growing angry at her words. While he had been willing to compromise and admit that he had been a prick, Snape was not entirely innocent. He had seen the distance between his Slytherin rival and Evans for a while now. Ever since Snape had started going around with the older Slytherins and started bullying other students, a drift had started enlarging between them both. How dare she blame him for her inevitable fallout with Snape?

"Stop kidding yourself, Evans," he hissed and Evans stood up at his words, narrowing her eyes angrily at him. "Your great friendship with Snivellus wasn't going to last till the end of this year. You'd both been drifting apart since he started going around with Voldemort's potential Slytherin followers and cursing students just cause they could!"

"You're such a hypocrite, Potter! Must I remind you that the reason you and I don't get along is because you do the exact same thing?"

"I do not, and nor have I ever, cast a spell or a curse on someone weaker or smaller than me, Evans," James corrected her and by then, they both were on their feet, shooting scathing glances at the other. "And I'm really getting tired of you blaming me for everything wrong with your life, Evans. It's not my fault that you couldn't keep your friendship with Snivellus. It's not my fault that you try your best and hardest at everything and yet, you can't beat me in Transfiguration. And it's not my fault that you're in such a foul mood because your relationship with your sister is practically ruined."

He wished he could take back everything he said the moment he was done venting. The tears in her eyes at his words brought an ache in his chest that he did not want to acknowledge. Merlin's pants, why had he brought her sister and Transfiguration into their conversation? Petunia had nothing to do with anything they were arguing about!

"Thank you for that, Potter," Lily said, so softly that he had almost missed it. He took a step towards her and stopped when stepped back.

"Evans, I didn't mean –"

"Of course you did," she cut him off and James silently cursed when she straightened and wiped the tears from her eyes. "Stay away from me, Potter. Stop asking me out. Stop talking to me. I hate you."

Without sparing him another look, she marched up the stairs to the girls dormitory.

"The feeling's mutual, Evans!" he called after her, not able to stop himself from having the last say. A loud bang of the door followed his exclamation and James shrank down onto the armchair, exhausted from the day's events.

"That was low, James."

He gave a startled yelp as Sirius emerged out of thin air, the Invisibility Cloak in his hands. James sighed as he put his head in his hands, overwhelmed and disgusted by what he had just said and done.

"We were idiots, weren't we?" James asked when he finally looked up. Sirius was still there, his expression sorrowful as he nodded his head. "But Snivellus is such a prick!"

"He is, isn't he? We were out of line too though," Sirirus shrugged when James gave him a startled look. "McGonagall sat me down just down. Needless to say, I feel like scum now. So what are you going to do about Evans?"

"What can I do, Padfoot?" the Fifth Year student asked his best friend and Sirius just shrugged again. "I tried apologizing to her and look how well that went. She said she wanted nothing to do with me when I tried to comfort her and told me to stay away from her. I hate her, Sirius."

"No, you don't."

"Yes, I do. I hate Lily Evans."

**4.**

"We definitely need to find a way to include the Room of Requirement into the Map," a very familiar voice mused and James groaned as he sat up from the couch he had been occupying. Not for the first time, he was torn between feeling irritated and thankful for friends who knew him too well.

"So why don't we cut to chase and not waste more time than we already have?" Peter asked as he made himself comfortable beside his friend. He ignored the glare James was throwing him, and instead chose to reach out for the plate of chocolate muffins that were placed conveniently on the table in front of him.

"I like Peter's idea very much," Sirius grinned and took an offered muffin. "Talk, Prongs. Now."

"What's there to talk about?" James mumbled and yelped when Remus hit him on the head. "What was that for?"

"For even attempting to avoid why you're holed up here," the werewolf shrugged and James sighed. "It's time to stop hiding, James."

"I'm not hiding."

"You're hiding from Lily, Prongs," Sirius grinned, as though he was enjoying James' state of emotional torture. Peter and Remus nodded their heads in agreement. James made a mental note to find himself three new best friends who were not as prone to poking their heads into his business like these three did.

"I'm not hiding," James protested again, albeit feebly.

"You're in love with her, James," Remus said, his handsome but tired face contorted into a genuine smile for his friend.

"No, I am not."

"Yes, you are."

"Fine, I am, alright? But it doesn't matter because she doesn't feel the same way about me!"

James sighed, resigned to the truth. He'd known from the moment he stepped foot into the dormitory he shared with Lily that he would be in trouble. The crush he had on her since Third Year had morphed into what he was certain was love. He'd tried his hardest to show her how much he had matured. At Remus' suggestion, he had stopped cursing Snape as much as he could and started talking to Lily as though he would talk to any other schoolmate. It had been hard at first, trying to not ask Lily out. But James soon realized that as soon as he did, Lily started warming up to him. And now that he was certain he was in love with her, it was difficult to stay in the same room as her without feeling the overwhelming urge to kiss her senseless.

"Yes, I do," a new but very familiar voice chimed in and James gulped as he stood up, slowly turning around to face the beautiful redhead who constantly occupied his thoughts. He looked at his friends, eyes widening when he saw their smug faces. Those bastards. He was definitely getting new friends.

"How did you find me here?"

"We've been roommates for about six months and I think I actually know the real you now," Lily smiled softly as she took his hands into hers and squeezed them. "And surprisingly, I can stand you well enough now."

"Love you too, Evans," James cheekily said and Lily giggled. It was funny how a year ago, she would have slapped him for his comment but right then, she found his comment amusing.

"So do I," she said softly, suddenly shy and serious. Her hands were still in his but her eyes were now on the ground. James froze at her admittance and his eyes widened before he chuckled happily and lifted Lily's chin with his hand and looked into her beautiful green eyes that he loved very much.

"I love you, Lily Evans," he said and she smiled at him, tears in her eyes.

"I love you too, James Potter."

He inched his face closer to hers, their lips only inches apart before he swooped in, unable to wait any longer. He'd waited years, not being able to decide whether he loved or hated her. He was not wasting any more time. And from the feel of her soft lips against his, James knew that there would never be a day where he doubted his love for Lily any longer.

"About damn time."

"Shut up, Sirius!"

**A/N: So, what do you guys think? A little too short or too much dialogue? Is there enough depth to cover the characters cause I personally am not happy with this but I can't seem to find a way to improve this oneshot. Let me know what you think please! So please review! **


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